20 One Liner Cat Jokes

  • Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
  • What is a cat’s way of keeping law & order? Claw Enforcement.
  • Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens.
  • What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purrpatrator.
  • Why is the cat so grouchy? Because he’s in a bad mewd.
  • What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
  • Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can’t? Your lap.
  • Why did the cat run from the tree? Because it was afraid of the bark!
  • How many cats can you put into an empty box? Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty.
  • How do cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.

Funny Cat One Liners - Cat humor

  • What does a cat like to eat on a hot day? A mice cream cone.
  • What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? A peeping tom.
  • If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws.
  • What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
  • Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? He set a new lap record.
  • Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens.
  • What is the difference between a cat and a comma? One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause.
  • What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? A peeping tom.
  • What is a cat’s favourite song? Three Blind Mice.
  • How did a cat take first prize at the bird show? He just jumped up to the cage, reached in, and took it.